Faithful cadets, as I'm sure you've seen all over the media there is some speculation that I may have been responsible for the death of Cap'n Shrimpstain. Well we all know that it's just not true. It's all a horrible story made up by that lovable dickweed Stan "The Can" Marino. You may have seen him spewing his bullshit with the master of bullshit on the "Oh Really? Factor" recently, but we all know only morons take that show seriously. The authorities have not found and will not find anything incriminating, and very soon this whole thing will blow over. You may also notice a new feature on all of my posts. Since the feds are currently in possession of my computer, I'm forced to do all of my posting at Moscow Karl's Internet Cafe, and because of this their advertisement banner automatically shows at the bottom of all of my posts. It's a nuisance, but it's a necessary one for now.
Until next time,
This is Captain Walrus signing off!
